Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
