dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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