I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
