at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
