I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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