brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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