Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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