But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
