You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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