I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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