I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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