The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
