normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
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