are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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