love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
