Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
