i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize