come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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