So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
