Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
She bit a glass in half.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
