I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
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