His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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