new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I intend to get homeless drunk
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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