I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Randomize