just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
