if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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