"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
