your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
