no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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