On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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