So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
