i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
