garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
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