Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Two words: nipple clamps
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