Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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