erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
