I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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