thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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