Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
