did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
