no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
