Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I got her a Nickelback box set.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
