its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
