Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
