I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
