the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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