boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
