I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize