Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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