her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
You have to summon your inner elephant
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
