we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
